This week, I am off work on my first week of disability. It’s snowing today. Snow days aren’t as bad as rainy days, but they aren’t sunshine either. I think that is how I’m feeling today. The treatment isn’t sunshine, but it isn’t depressing rain either. The following are some updates on my cancer progress.
Radiation
I start radiation on Monday, 2/17. I will go every day, Monday through Friday that week and the week of 2/24 (10 sessions total). They will focus on the lesions on my spine. The goal is to reduce the size of these lesions. I will not be on Kisqali during these two weeks.
Breast MRI
My breast MRI results did show a 1 cm suspicious area in my right breast. At this time, since the cancer has already metastasized, I will not have a biopsy. The treatment protocol wouldn’t change; the only reason to do the biopsy would be to acknowledge that this is the spot, and it may not be. After discussing this with Dr. Millard and Dr. Gildea, I have decided that this knowledge isn’t worth the risk of doing the biopsy.
The breast MRI also revealed additional lesions on my sternum, right scapula, and right ribs. I’m not going to lie; reading this freaked me out. However, an hour after I read the results, Dr. Millard called (unprompted) and assured me that she wasn’t surprised at all that I have lesions on other bones. I think it is what I suspected, but I just didn’t want to go there. However, Dr. Millard assured me that these are certainly treatable with the Kisqali that I am taking. I know I have only started working with Dr. Millard, but her patient care is outstanding.
Other scans
On Friday, 2/14, I will have a bone scan of all bones. While talking with Dr. Millard, I came to grips with what I had been suspecting – more lesions will be found. However, again, Dr. Millard isn’t fazed by this; she has been expecting this. This bone scan as well as CT scans will become part of my regular life as my cancer is monitored over the years.
Work
This week I am completely off work – 100% disability. Next week, I plan to resume working approximately 2-3 days per week depending on my energy level. That has been the biggest shock to me. As someone who normally has a high energy level, I feel off not having a lot of stamina. I am so thankful for my supervisor who keeps assuring me that we will figure things out; the most important thing is getting me well.
Upcoming excitement
Next week, my daughter Liz and granddaughter Micah will be here for a visit. I am so excited to have them here from Kansas!!! Other good news includes Kristen hearing today that she was accepted into James Madison University (her alma mater) Nurse Practitioner program. She will begin this summer.
Faith
My friend, Ruth, reminded me at the very beginning of this journey to “Fear not tomorrow, God is already there.” This was so true last night. When I panicked about test results that I was reading, Dr. Millard already had a good feeling for what they would be. She called at just the right time for me. She took the time I needed to get questions answered. She knew; I was only trying to understand. Likewise, God knows my future with all of this. I need to trust Him to have the answers. He isn’t going to be surprised along this journey, He’s already there.
Kim Holman's Journey 
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